Saddam Hussein and George W. Bush agree to meet up in Baghdad for the first round of talks in a new peace process. When George sits down, he notices three buttons on the arm of Saddam's chair. They begin talking.

After about five minutes Saddam presses the first button. A boxing glove springs out of a box on the desk and punches Bush in the face.

Annoyed, Bush carries on talking as Saddam laughs. A few minutes later the second button is pressed. This time a big boot comes out and kicks Bush in the shin.

Again Saddam laughs, and again George carries on talking, not wanting to put off the bigger issue of peace between the two countries. But when the third button is pressed and another boot comes out and kicks Bush square in the privates, he's finally had enough. "I'm heading' back home!" he calmly tells the Iraqi. "We'll finish these talks in Washington in two weeks!"

A fortnight passes and Saddam flies to the United States for talks. As the two men sit down, Hussein notices three buttons on Bush's chair arm and prepares himself for the Texan's retaliation. They begin talking and George presses the first button. Saddam ducks, but nothing happens. George snickers but they continue talking.

A few minutes later he presses the second button. Saddam jumps up, but again nothing happens. Bush roars with laughter. They continue the talks but when the third button is pressed, Saddam jumps up again, but again nothing happens. Bush falls on the floor in a fit of hysterics.

"Forget this," says Saddam. "I'm going back to Baghdad!"

George W. says, through tears of laughter, "What Baghdad??"

Back to Index